Ross Evans and Drew Hoffman saw plans for their 35K big day left in turmoil when Drew’s visa delays saw him stuck in the USA – but they decided to go ahead with the wedding
A groom was marooned from his own wedding still managed to appear and marry via iPad, urging his guests not to be sad.
Ross Evans and Drew Hoffman watched plans for their £35,000 celebration descend into chaos when Drew’s visa complications left him trapped in the USA. They discovered unforeseen bureaucracy would keep them thousands of miles apart on the biggest and most romantic day of their lives.
However, as they had already secured the venue, and with guests arriving from across the globe, the duo took the ‘challenging’ decision to proceed.
Drew, 28, perched on his hotel bed in LA wearing his ‘lavish’ wedding attire whilst being broadcast live on two screens – one positioned at the top table and another circulated amongst the attendees. He appeared in the official wedding photographs through the screen. Space was reserved for him to be ‘digitally inserted’ into treasured family portraits.
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And he was still capable of delivering his speech and participating in the first dance as the pair said they did ‘everything possible’ to create a memorable occasion. Ross, 29, said: “We spared no expense. But what was a £35k wedding for both of us, it ended up just being me and Drew had to experience it on an iPad.
“I did not actually want to go through with it. It felt just way too hard but as all friends and family were coming from all over the world, we knew we would never get them all in one place again.”
They chose not to proceed with the formal ceremony as Ross said “it would have been too awkward walking down the aisle with an iPad.”
Instead they went straight to the drinks reception followed by dinner and evening celebrations. Ross continued: “It was really difficult – I put on my outfit and sobbed my face off – I could not believe Drew was still not here.
“But I knew I had to be strong with all our friends and family and everyone was really supportive. At first the mood was a bit weird. People did not know what to say and everyone was a bit gobsmacked I think. But we made the most of it.
“When we got to dinner and speeches, Drew said he didn’t want anyone to be sad. He wanted it to be a happy, joyous, celebration and that really uplifted the mood. It was emotional and everyone was crying. Everyone got really drunk and had a great time. The food was amazing. I carried Drew around the whole time on the iPad. But it was still like being punched in the gut constantly that he was not here. But we tried to make the most of it.”
The pair first crossed paths whilst working as performers on cruise ships and have been an item for almost ten years. They had already become ‘officially’ wed in front of just three witnesses at the end of 2020 but wanted a grand celebration to mark their love before family and friends.
They had reserved the Hopetoun House in Edinburgh for July 23 2022 complete with Highland Cows, fully bespoke attire, a 20 man pipe band and an extravagant reception. Drew had already organised a bespoke outfit that had been custom-made for roughly a year whilst Ross had ordered tartan and a kilt. They also had a specially-made tartan pattern featuring their surnames.
Massive backlogs in the Home Office visa processing system, caused by Covid and the Ukrainian conflict, meant they received an unexpected ‘delay alert’ in April – just three months before their special day. The couple then endured a nerve-wracking wait to discover whether Drew’s visa would materialise, with him clinging to hope right up until the eve of the ceremony.
He explained: “We actually withdrew the first application as the Home Office looked at the wrong and current guidelines after Covid. Our second application went in at the end of 2021 which should have been plenty of time. But we actually found out on April Fools Day 2022 the visa had been delayed and just had to wait. There was no real system to check the application or find out how it was progressing.
“Everything for the wedding was already set in stone and we decided we will go through with it whatever happened in the hope Drew would be able to come. But when we got to around June those hopes really started to dwindle and we feared we were not getting there in time.”
Drew added: “I honestly did not accept defeat until the day after the wedding happened. When we were getting close, a lot of people started getting their visas quickly. If I had got it the day before, or even on the day, I would have found a flight to get me there and showed up to get into the party. I did not accept I wouldn’t make it up until the day I wasn’t there.”
Drew revealed that he woke up at 5am on the morning of the wedding after booking himself two nights at a posh hotel in LA. He then made a desperate plea for help to get his elaborate wedding outfit on and confessed he cried the whole time.
He facetimed Ross as they prepared together, bought himself some booze and spent his wedding day perched on the edge of his hotel bed.
“I experienced my whole wedding day on the iPad from the hotel,” he added. “A big part of me wanted to try and embrace the absurdity of it and thought ‘let’s just do it. I think it is still really hard to enjoy and accept the parts of it I was missing.
“I was being passed around and obviously missed a lot of what was going on. Interacting became a bit harder as people were drinking. As they became more intoxicated the camera certainly jiggled around a lot more.”
Drew admitted the entire day was a rollercoaster of emotions and he still felt a pang of sadness that he couldn’t be there in person.
Being passed around on camera meant he was able to speak to everyone there,
The pair revealed the cruel twist of fate was that Drew’s visa was approved just two weeks following the ceremony, and he immediately boarded a plane to reunite with Ross in Scotland.
Ross continued: “The photographer agreed to come back and allow us to do some photos together. He was also photoshopped into the family photos. They left a gap so he could fit in seamlessly. Honestly, looking at the photos you could not tell he wasn’t there.
“We can laugh about it now. The irony is if the wedding was just two weeks later he would have been here. It was all just meant to be.”
The duo have now made their home in Falkirk where they operate a dance studio called Slay House Glasgow.