Baby name expert SJ Strum has shared how you can avoid embarrassing baby name fails and ensure you’re choosing a moniker that will suit your child throughout their life
SJ Strum is a baby name expert an internet personality, who often advises parents on social media about names they could pick for their little one. She regularly appears on ITV’s This Morning, taking phone calls from parents who have no idea what to call their children. Helpfully, she then comes up with a list of names based on the parents’ preferences.
The parenting guru also uses TikTok to help parents choose a moniker, dealing with “baby name emergencies” from distraught mums and dads who don’t know which direction to take. Because let’s be honest, if you feel as though you’ve got it wrong, it can feel catastrophic.
SJ exclusively told The Mirror that there are things you can do to ensure you don’t have a ‘baby name fail,’ which often get brutally posted about on Reddit threads.
She wrote: “Choosing your baby name is up there as one of life’s biggest decisions; it feels like a huge responsibility to be given the freedom to come up with a name that will suit this little person you love most in the world, often before you’ve even met them.
“You want to love it now, and forever. You want it to be ‘perfect’ – yet the choice can become overwhelming, and that’s even before you start sharing the name and everyone pipes in with an unwelcome opinion. I’ve worked with thousands of parents helping to name their babies for the last ten years, and here are my top three ways to avoid the common pitfalls that come with baby naming.”
1. Set your criteria upfront
A stage that’s often forgotten in the excitement to begin delving into naming is to set your criteria, and if you’re in a couple, to crucially agree on that criteria!
The most common issue I face is a couple who cannot agree and when I look at their name lists I can see immediately when they’re literally working off two different playbooks.
So ask the big questions up front:
- How unique do we want our name to be? Knowing if you’re going for a traditional classic or a standout out brave name will help get you on the same page immediately, or help you to understand where you need to compromise.
- Are we honouring a loved one? The battle for middle-spot grandparents or that family tradition of the firstborn always having his dad’s name can trip people up, so have the tough chat early on. Rihanna just announced her third baby’s name Rocki, following siblings RZA and Riot, do you want to use your own initials to add that family link?
- What style of name do you like? Looking at your name list, if you have one or are writing down all the names in your family, what style are you drawn to? Long names with lots of syllables? Punchy, urban style names? Vintage or Modern? Having a list of must-haves and no-gos, just like if you were house hunting, will set you up to avoid a fail.
2. Look at meanings
All names have meanings and it’s a perfect place to research to find a name that feels truly special. Ed Sheeran chose Jupiter for his second baby due to it meaning ‘Brave and Bold’. You can look at your own name meanings, your surname’s meaning. Or find meaning in your heritage – would you love a Welsh name or a Sanskrit nod?
If you already have children, look at linking their name meanings. Olivia, meaning ‘peace’, with Noah, meaning ‘to rest’, is lovely (and optimistic for a newborn!).
3. Special memories and passions
Just like Mark Wright and Michelle Keagen chose Palma after their favourite holiday location, or Lily Collins from Emily In Paris chose the name Tove for her daughter representing her love of Moomins written by Tove Jansson – I always encourage people not to go by an A-Z but to look first as your own passions and experiences.
Do you love Jazz, Romantasy novels or spaces like the Ocean or Forest? Choosing a name inspired by something you love will always spark joy.
My new name book, Baby Name Envy, includes a Style Guide quiz to get you on the right track with your name criteria and all the name lists are uniquely organised by Passion and Theme, not just A-Zso you can find a name you’ll love forever.
SJ Strum’s new book ‘Baby Name Envy’ can be bought from Amazon now.