Her mum was never afraid of death, but her dad was always terrified. Still, he was more scared of living without his wife. The couple asked their daughter to help them end their lives together
A woman who helped both of her parents end their lives together has spoken out for the first time about the agony of fulfilling their wishes.
Corinne Gregory Sharpe, 61, was inseparable with her two parents and cherished their “close knit” bond. She had no idea that her beloved mum and dad would ask her to help with a sacrifice that many of us simply cannot fathom.
In 2021, she helped Eva and Druse Neumann end their own lives through medical aid in dying (MAID). Four years on, Corinne has bravely shared intimate details from her parents’ final hours and why she believes they deserved to die on their own terms.
The couple were deeply in love, enjoying later life together after Eva retired from office management at a car dealership and Druse from a commercial electrical supply company.
At 92, Eva still kept an active lifestyle but she’d suffered a long spate of health issues – including a heart attack. In May 2018, doctors diagnosed her with aortic stenosis, a condition where the valve which controls blood flow from the heart to the body becomes obstructed or narrowed. Medics warned that her prognosis wasn’t very promising.
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“The doctors basically gave her 18 months, maybe two years to live without a pretty invasive surgery,” Corrine told PEOPLE magazine.
The daughter recalled her mother really not wanting to go ahead with surgery, as it offered no guarantees that she would live longer. Eva wanted to simply ‘let things go as they go’.
Corrine and her dad Druse struggled to come to terms with Eva’s diagnosis and reluctance to try surgery, and while her health stayed relatively stable for a few years, everything changed in April 2021 when she suffered a painful fall that landed her in hospital.
The mum was hospitalised for three days before going to rehab for 10 days to recover. And just a week after his wife’s accident, ‘panicked’ Druse, 95, started to experience stroke-like symptoms.
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The distraught husband, who had a history of mini strokes, began slurring his words and speaking incoherently, Corrine explained. Doctors said it was likely he’d suffered a stroke after his wife’s fall and the couple ended up in the same rehab centre.
Things deterirorated quickly, much to Corrine’s shock. She couldn’t fathom that medics were advising that she should consider an at-home hospice for her mum. Throughout the whole ordeal, Corrine says that Eva was never afraid of death. And by June 2021, the mum decided she wanted to pursue medical aid in dying.
The option was available to Eva through Washington’s Death with Dignity Act, a law which allows those living in the state with terminal illness to die through lethal medication without supervision from medics.
It’s distinctly different from euthanasia because the patients themselves administer the fatal drug, rather than a doctor.
Unike Eva, Druse was always afraid of dying, and his wife’s decision left him distraught. One night, he worringly asked his daughter ‘What happens to me if she goes first?’. Corrine says that her dad ‘couldn’t see a scenario where he would want to continue if mum was gone’.
Druse eventually told his daughter that despite recovering from his stroke, he wanted to die alongside his wife and choose MAID if he was permitted to.
In a ‘surreal’ moment, Corrine found herself advocating for her own father’s death in a ‘race’ to get him qualified. Doctors eventually deemed that Druse was eligible because he may have another stroke that would leave him incapacitated.
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The wheels were in motion, and Corrine came to the terrifying realisation that she would be losing both of her parents at the same time. The daughter described the ordeal as a ‘painful paradox’.
Still, she stayed by their side during their final weeks, moving in with her parents and hosting special family dinners, cooking their favourite meals and drinking champagne. The trio re-lived precious childhood memories as they spent their last days as a family.
They even joked about choosing a “death date” and wanted to avoid ruining any upcoming birthdays or holidays. Eva and Druce eventually chose Friday August 13 as the day they would say their final goodbye.
The couple, alongside their daughter, enjoyed ‘the Last Happy Hour’ together the night before their deaths. “My mum and I sat around on the deck and then she crawled into her bed. And I asked if I could lay down and sleep with her for a little bit…It was perfect,” Corrine said.
In the morning, Corrine and her husband were right by her parents’ side as the lethal ‘cocktail’ was prepared. “They got to sit in their own bed and hold hands with each other and talk before they were able to take the meds,” the daughter said.
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“We put music on and they took the cocktail. Then we poured a glass of wine and we had a final toast. About 10 minutes after they drank it, they went to sleep.”
The process can take hours, Corrine said, but her parents were gone within the hour. That night, all of her pent-up emotions came to the surface and she ‘sobbed her brains out’.
“They’re going somewhere where we can’t join them and it’s just, it’s mind boggling,” she said.
Corrine chose to tell her family’s story to raise awareness and spark healthy discussions about death. She believes people in other states in the US should have the right to choose to ‘ease their suffering’.
Her story comes as the assisted dying bill has moved one step closer to becoming law in the UK. Last month, the bill passed its second reading in the House of Lords and nearly 200 peers shared their views in the two-day debate.
The new legislation proposes allowing terminally ill adults in England and Wales, who have fewer than six months to live, to apply for an assisted death. This would be subject to approval by two doctors and a panel made up of a social worker, a psychiatrist and a senior legal figure.
For emotional support you can call the Samaritans 24-hour helpline on 116 123, email [email protected], visit a Samaritans branch in person or go to the Samaritans website