A teacher named Ms Claudia, who has over 20 years of experience with children, shared her go-to phrase for calming down a toddler in the middle of a temper tantrum – and it actually works
If you’re a parent, you’ve most likely heard the terms ‘terrible twos’ or ‘threenagers’ thrown around when discussing toddlers and younger children.
As they’re growing older and discover how to navigate the world, young kids can be susceptible to emotional outbursts and breakdowns when they become overwhelmed or when situations don’t go as they wanted them to. While these emotional episodes are stressful for both the kids and their parents, they’re a normal part of child development, according to the NHS. This is because younger children can’t manage their feelings like grown-ups do, as tantrums often arise from frustration and limited communication abilities.
While it can be easy for parents to also become emotional and stress when their child is mid-tantrum, especially when they happen in public spaces, it’s crucial to approach these situations with care and understanding.
To help, one teacher called Ms Claudia, who’s spent over 20 working with young children, has stepped forward to share her knowledge on helping a small child calm down during an emotional meltdown.
Posting on her TikTok page, which is known as ‘thrivingmindsmontessori’, Ms Claudia teased: “If your toddler is having a tantrum, kicking and screaming, this one simple phrase will help them calm down almost instantly.”
She went on to explain many parents might think the ‘best thing’ to do during a toddler’s tantrum is to say things like ‘calm down, you’re fine’. However she went on to warn that these phrases often makes the situation worse.
The teacher explained: “But after working with kids as a Montessori teacher of over 20 years, I can tell you this – those phrases don’t work! They actually make things worse for you and your child.”
Instead, she suggested using an alternative phrase that can help sooth and calm them down. She advised: “Here’s a phrase that will actually help them calm down – ‘of course that felt big. I would have felt that way too’.”
Ms Claudia explained that by acknowledging their feelings with this phrase, children feel understood and validated, which is crucial for their emotional well-being.
“This one sentence makes them feel safe. And when the child feels safe, that’s when they calm down,” she added.
“So next time your child is sad because their snack broke, say ‘of course that felt big, I would have felt sad too’,” she told her viewers.
The comments section was soon brimming with praise for Ms Claudia’s advice, with one user exclaiming: “I wish everyone watched Ms Claudiaaaa.
“Nobody wants to be told to calm down adults or children,” echoed another commenter, highlighting the universal truth behind her guidance.