As Axel Rudakubana tried to turn his sentencing into a circus, by screaming at the Judge from the dock and demanding to see a paramedic, I felt relieved that some of the girl’s parents had decided not to attend court
There are things you see and hear that you can never unsee or forget.
Hearing the details of the horrific injuries these little girls sustained was so appalling that at times I had to stop writing and take a deep breath with my head in my hands.
Sobs and sniffles from the public gallery in court were a constant reminder that this disturbed teenager had ripped so many lives apart when he killed Bebe King, Elsie Dot Stancombe and Alice Da Silva Aguair.
As Axel Rudakubana tried to turn his sentencing into a circus, by screaming at the Judge from the dock and demanding to see a paramedic, I felt relieved that some of the girl’s parents had decided not to attend court.
Before it had even begun, the gutless killer forced the packed out courtroom to wait 50 minutes before he sloped into the dock and buried his head between his knees.
The court heard how he had been refusing to eat or drink for the last 10 days, but had been assessed and medically fit and capable to attend.
When he was eventually thrown out by the Judge for being disruptive I felt a sense of relief again. But it was short-lived.
For just minutes later we would be shown the CCTV of the attack as it unfolded. Gasps of horror ripped through the room as we watched little girls collapse in the carpark, desperately fleeing for their lives with stab wounds across their tiny bodies.
One woman was so distraught she had to get up and leave. When the court was shown the moment that heroic dance teacher Leanne Lucas led a group of girls running through the car park to safety, she too had to leave the courtroom.
Many covered their eyes and faces as a picture of the bloodied knife used flashed up on a TV screen reviewing the evidence.
On several occasions prosecutor Deanna Heer gave members of the gallery chances to leave if they felt unable to hear the nature of the injuries that three slain girls, and ten others attacked, sustained that day.
If the research and horrific material Rudakubana viewed in the months before his premeditated and planned attack wasn’t startling enough, the descriptions of the injuries he inflicted on those little girls were so unspeakable they would haunt you forever.
In a 15-minute rampage he stabbed his fatal victims more than 200 times, returning to attack them multiple times after they had already fallen from their injuries.
As the prosecutor put it, their injuries would have been ‘untreatable’ no matter how quickly emergency help arrived.
But despite the horrors of this case there were small glimmers of hope, including when one of the survivors, a 14-year-old girl addressed the court to tell Rudakubana she thinks he’s a coward.
Her voice barely faltered throughout her deeply moving statement in which she told him: “whilst you live behind bars alone, I will make sure that my sister and I, and our family will do our best to move forward with our lives”.
As Rudakubana was jailed for life with a minimum of 52 years behind bars, friends and relatives of the victims held hands and cried silently.
He will be nearly 70-years-old before he could be even considered for release, but as the Judge said in court, it seems at this time unlikely he will ever be freed.