Most people have shared their first kiss with someone they fancy by the age of 28, but one woman explained why she’d chosen not to kiss anyone – and she’s concerned about dating too
A woman has shared that she’s never been kissed at the age of 28, but it doesn’t bother her too much right now because she believes that she hasn’t met a man with qualities she admires thus far. She shared that she’s “in a really good place” in her life, saying she’s the “happiest” she’s ever been “physically and mentally,” as she’s “active” with a “stable job”.
However, when it comes to the romance element of her life, she just can’t seem to crack the code. She admitted that she didn’t know what to do, because she’d recently deleted dating apps, and just wasn’t sure about how to meet men “organically” who are actually “nice”.
She took to Reddit’s ‘Ask’ forum to explain: “Last summer, I decided to download dating apps and only went on two dates with two different guys months apart.
“The first one was nice, but it didn’t work out because of my communication (you live and you learn). The second guy was a total creep who made me want to take a self-defence class afterwards”.
She continued by explaining she keeps “downloading and redownloading” dating apps, but she grew “frustrated with the entire experience”.
“I receive a good amount of likes and match with a fair number of men, but no one ever really talks. And honestly, I didn’t try that hard cause of the idea that ‘oh there’s always another option out there’,” she explained.
The woman then explained that because she’d been to Coachella in April, she didn’t miss dating apps as she was having “the time of her life” and she “never felt happier”.
But now the excitement has died down and she’s feeling like she wants to date again, she admitted that she didn’t know what to do.
She ended her post by writing: “How do I meet a nice guy? I’m nearing my 30s, and I feel like I should be doing something to meet people. Just looking for thoughts here and maybe a little encouragement”.
In the comments, someone pointed out that you have to be open to connection to receive connection, penning: “It seems like everyone lives very atomised lives now. Get up. Wash teeth. Check Social Media. Eat breakfast or gym. Wear headphones and use phone / tablet throughout. Commute to work.
“Watch something at your desk with a sandwich. Commute home, cook for one, watch Netflix then bed by 9. Our daily lives are engineered so it is easy to avoid real human connections if we so wish.
“You can only meet people if your eyes are looking and your ears are listening. Change your routines. Seek new interests just to meet new people or rekindle old interests. If your friends are in relationships, ask them have they any single friends.
“You have to put yourself out there unless you are a particularly attractive person. The reason people often meet in University is often because there is a social expectation or pressure, even, to socialise.
“As we get older, that pressure eases and we get a bit too comfortable with our own company. The problem is, you [have to] hope a lot more of your generation does too”.
The woman responded, agreeing, saying that she wanted “human connection,” with somebody likening dating apps to “Amazon shopping lists”.
One man said: “Go to a board gaming event near you. Us single men are there”. A Redditor recommended: “Go to good areas to meet good people. Having barely any experience is a double-edged sword. Please be careful and aware of red flags and have the strength to walk away”.
Another offered lovely advice, writing: “Just try and meet people regardless of gender. Enjoy yourself and pick up some hobbies and just meet people organically and things will fall into place. Smile, laugh, have fun. It will all work out”.