Gill Dunn and her husband Paul were enjoying a two week holiday in Thailand to celebrate his retirement after 20 years of working in the NHS when he suffered a stroke on the flight home
A British woman was left with no choice but to bring her husband’s remains home in a rucksack after he died on their retirement holiday in what she’s called a “bureaucratic nightmare”.
69-year-old Gill Dunn and her husband, Paul, 66, headed off to Thailand for two weeks as a celebratory holiday for his retirement after more than 20 years of working in the NHS. The pair enjoyed an “amazing” holiday in Thailand, where they saw elephants, toured temples and went on rickshaw rides.
But just two hours into their flight home, Paul suffered a stroke onboard the plane, with the pilot forced to perform an emergency landing in Delhi, India.
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Paul was rushed to the hospital, but after two weeks in the ICU he sadly died on March 5. Gill described her husband’s cremation as “brutal” and after three weeks in Delhi, she ended up having to bring her husband of 31 years home in a backpack.
But before she could bring her husband back to the UK, she had to contact multiple different agencies and government departments. Gill, a volunteer with Citizens Advice, from Leicester, said: “Our dream holiday ended up a bureaucratic nightmare.
“He had wonderful hospital care but the rest of it was not ideal. I had a lot of conflicting information, it was like being in a maze. I can’t tell you the relief it was to leave India.
“Every day there was this knife in the back of bureaucracy. By the time we had his remains and knew we could fly home [it was] was a relief. It was this relief of coming home and knowing we could do things properly. I wanted to be home to lay my husband to rest the way he deserved.”
Paul retired from his role as a director of transplant laboratory services at Leicester Hospital in November 2023. Gill, also retired, and Paul flew out to Thailand on February 3 this year.
“My husband was invited to a talk in Bangkok with his old colleagues,” Gill explained. “After that, we spent two weeks in Thailand to celebrate his retirement. We saw elephants, we visited the most amazing temples and had a ride in a rickshaw going around an old city. We did a great variety of things, the people were lovely, they are really kind and gentle people.”
After two weeks in Thailand, the couple returned to Bangkok before flying back to the UK. But on February 1, Paul suffered a stroke on a Thai Airways flight.
“They called for everyone to help, and a GP and A&E nurse came to help,” Gill said. When they got to the hospital, Gill realised she had nowhere to stay, so a nurse let her stay in a room next to Paul.
Their son Matthew, and his partner Amy, flew out and found Gill a place to stay near the hospital. But after two weeks in the ICU, Paul died on March 5.
“Firstly the doctors thought Paul was doing ok, my son and his fiancée arrived on the Monday,” Gill recalled. “Luckily, they were able to say goodbye to him because he started to get worse before he passed away.”
Following Paul’s death, Gill and her family were taken to a cremation ground. Gill said: “We had to go in this awful hearse ambulance with Paul’s body in the back. We ended up at a cremation site, he was shoved on some logs and put in an oven.”
Gill said the three weeks she spent in Delhi were plagued by red tape and bureaucracy. When she first arrived in Delhi, she got an emergency visa but was told she needed to immediately apply for an exit visa instead. She also had to get permission from the police, and the immigration office, to bring her husband back to the UK because they said she needed a cremation certificate and a death certificate.
“I had to go to the police station to get permission to get home,” Gill said. “I then went to the British Embassy, who didn’t offer me any help. They sent me an email telling me how to repatriate someone, with a list of funeral directors.”
By March 7, Gill was sent the exit visa and was permitted to leave the country. She headed home with Matthew, Amy and her husband Paul’s remains in a rucksack the following day.
“By the Friday night we got the remains back and all these other certificates saying we could leave,” Gill said. “We knew we could finally get home, I had to carry Paul’s ashes home in a rucksack.”
Gill and Paul were together for 42 years, having been married for 31 of them. She described her late husband as a “gentleman” who loved the countryside. Gill said: “Everyone keeps saying what a gentleman he was.
“He was a quiet man who was full of kindness and compassion. He wasn’t someone who would be in charge of the party, but he was someone that everyone loved. Paul was known for his lovely, quiet sense of humour and a twinkle in his eye.”