A woman feels as though her ‘entire relationship is a lie’ after discovering that her husband has been keeping a secret from her since the first year of their romance
Relationships should be built on trust – and one woman has found out the hard way what happens when this trust is broken.
We all know how important trust is in relationships. If you can’t trust your partner, then you’ll always be worried about what they’re up to, as you’ll never be able to confirm that they’re not lying to you. That can leave you feeling paranoid and is a sure-fire way to send a romance plummeting into the ground.
One woman who believed she could trust her husband has just been dealt a heavy blow in her marriage, as she’s discovered he has actually been keeping a huge secret from her for a decade. The woman explained she’s been married to her husband for two years, but they have been together for 10 – and she recently found out something he has been keeping from her since the very beginning of their relationship.
In a post on Reddit, the mum-of-two said that during the first year that they were together, the couple had an argument after a pool party at her parents’ house. It was alleged at the time that her now-husband had “fooled around” with her friend in the hot tub, but he “swore up and down that he didn’t” so she forgave him.
However, after a “stupid drunken fight” 10 years later, her husband told her the truth – that he did cheat on her with her friend all those years ago.
She said: “My husband and I were in a stupid drunken fight and he admitted he actually did fool around with her in the hot tub back then. After 10 f***ing years, he finally admitted it and shattered my entire world at once. I don’t know what to do or where to start with even thinking through this.”
The woman added that she doesn’t want to break up her marriage for the sake of her children, but she doesn’t think she could ever forgive her husband for lying to her. She noted that he “gaslit” her into believing she was “crazy” for accusing him of being unfaithful, when all along he had actually gone behind her back.
WARNING: The post below contains explicit language, reader discretion is advised
Commenters on the post urged her to reconsider her marriage, as they said that although she might think she’s doing the right thing for her children, her kids will be able to tell their parents “aren’t happy”.
One person said: “Here is the problem – he didn’t JUST cheat on you. He cheated on you, allowed you to destroy a friendship while he continued to lie, lied and gaslit you for a decade, and finally used it as a weapon against you in a fight. He is not a good person.”
Another added: “The cheating is one thing. The lying is another. The maliciousness of admitting to it to hurt you during a fight is another. If it were me, I’d be able to forgive my partnerfor cheating in that situation if I never knew about it in the first place. But I wouldn’t be able to forgive my partner if he lied to me/gaslit me for years whenever I brought it up and/or if he only admitted to it to hurt me during a fight.”
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