A mum was left seething and desperate to write a letter to the parents of her son’s girlfriend after her dad called him an unforgivable two-word name – but others told her to back off
A mum found herself fuming on her son’s behalf after his girlfriend’s dad called him an evil two-word name.
She felt as though she had to explain the situation’s backstory before anyone could make a proper judgement, so the stressed woman explained her son and his girlfriend had been “on and off for four years.”
“During that time, they have split up twice. On both occasions, the split happened because they both got drunk, got off with other people, and didn’t tell each other. In other words, there was cheating on both sides,” she explained on Mumsnet.
She shared the pair of them “always end up back together,” as they “love each other, and are extremely well-suited, prefer each other to anybody else, and have a great time together.”
“Most recently, they got back together in October, decided that their previous transgressions were a sign that they were just young and not quite ready – but now they are older, they want to make a proper commitment to each other, be faithful and stay together,” she penned, pleased the pair finally wanted to immerse themselves in their relationship together fully.
The mum said, much like with any relationship, who knows “whether it will work,” but said she was “rooting for them” and hopes they’ll be “very happy together.” Unfortunately, her son’s girlfriend’s dad does not feel the same way about their relationship.
She shared that he’d referred to her son as an evil two-word name – “cheating weasel” – and even said since October, her son hasn’t been allowed into his house, where his girlfriend lives.
The mum penned: “This means that my son and his girlfriend spend most of their time in my house, where they are both absolutely welcome. I cook the girlfriend endless meals, look after her when she’s ill, and take her out for dinner when the whole family is going out.
“My attitude is that anyone my children love is welcome at home (within reason, obviously – I wouldn’t welcome a serial killer) and if my son holds no grudge for previous cheating (which would be a bit rich since he did the same!) then I certainly don’t either. It’s his home too and therefore up to him.”
She said she “cannot understand how his girlfriend’s dad isn’t totally ashamed of himself,” when they’ve welcomed her son’s girlfriend back with “open arms”.
“I also cannot understand how the girlfriend’s mother can go along with this terrible policy. I’ve decided that if my son and his girlfriend ever split up, I’m going to write her parents a letter and tell them exactly what I think of them. I’ve also decided that neither her father nor her mother are welcome in my house – not that this should ever be an issue,” she raged.
In the comments, one woman wrote: “You’re over-involved. Writing them a letter if your son and girlfriend ever broke up is over the top. Are you absolutely sure her parents are even aware she cheated, too? Stay well out of it.”
Someone else shared: “I think you’re very invested in what you describe as an adult relationship and perhaps would benefit from stepping back. Ultimately, whether you agree or disagree, it is the parent’s house, and they have a prerogative over who enters it.
“They may have been told a very different story to what you were told. Who knows. Leave your son to manage his own relationships and fight his own battles. This one isn’t yours to take on.”
Another penned: “Your son’s girlfriend may have fed her parents a somewhat… altered story about the constant break ups and get-togethers. She may have edited her part. Maybe your son has told you another story that’s not quite true (although I would have thought that she would have put you right by now).
“But actually – it’s none of your business. They are 20. By all means, make her comfortable in your home, but stay out of her parents’ relationship with her. You only know what you are being told.”