Chesney Hawkes was reaching the climax of his entertaining show centred on him being, well, “the one and only”. And after an evening of songs and self-deprecating humour about his status as a 1991 one-hit wonder, this number was the moment everyone in the audience had been waiting for…
We were in the stylish Limelight Club on board P&O’S Britannia, as it sailed across the Caribbean – and Chesney was unwittingly summing up the whole cruise experience. With endless opportunities for entertainment, activities, soaking up the sun, excellent food and the chance to experience a different country almost every day for two weeks, a cruise really is the one and only holiday you’ll ever need.
We joined the ship a few days earlier in Bridgetown, Barbados. It was November but the temperature was still in the low 30s. With just two main seasons, the cooler dry season from December to May and the wet season from June to late November, it is warm all year here. Even during our November cruise, however, there was very little rain.
Checking into and boarding the ship was painless. We didn’t even have to worry about our luggage as that was collected from the airport and delivered directly to our cabin.
Britannia is P&O’s flagship and underwent a multi-million pound refit last year. It is huge with space for 3,647 passengers across 15 guest decks and the majority of cabins have a balcony. On board, there are more than 20 bars and restaurants, offering everything from a quick ice cream or pastry at the Market Cafe in Britannia’s spectacular Atrium to an evening of fine dining in the Epicurean restaurant.
The ship also has four swimming pools with lively bar areas and more than enough sun loungers to go round. My wife Alison and I stayed in a Superior Deluxe Balcony cabin. With its comfortable bed, settee and two large flatscreen televisions, it certainly lived up to its name.
We enjoyed sitting on the balcony with a cup of tea, watching the seabirds dive for fish next to the ship. I also loved opening the curtains each morning to see our new port of call. On several evenings, tasty canapes were delivered to the cabin, a lovely touch that makes your holiday even more special.
Before setting sail we took a bus excursion around Barbados. The most easterly of the Caribbean islands, Barbados was colonised by Britain in 1627 and its economy is built on sugar, rum and tourism. Our guide, Jason, was very informative, telling us about the island’s “Seven Wonders”, including the grapefruit, first discovered here. Of course, with Barbados being considered the birthplace of rum, there were a few punches enjoyed along the way.
That night we ate in The Epicurean, where we lapped up a gourmet meal.
The decor is luxurious, the food sumptuous and the service exemplary. My rump of lamb was melt-in-the-mouth tender and the dark chocolate tart decadence on a plate. Unlike many fine-dining restaurants, the portions served up are substantial and you certainly won’t be hungry again an hour later.
The Epicurean is one of several restaurants on board not included in the price of your cruise. The others are The Beach House, which serves Caribbean, South American and American-influenced cuisine. Then there’s The Glass House, offering tapas as well as tasty main courses, with wines chosen by expert Olly Smith.
The Sindhu offers an Indian fusion menu – I particularly enjoyed the steak with curried mashed potato – and of course, there’s the Limelight Club. The Beach House and Glass House are more casual but you’ll need to dress smartly for others, particularly on Celebration Nights when black tie is de rigueur
Tables can be reserved when you book your cruise, or when on board for a slightly higher cost. Either way, the prices are very reasonable. All-inclusive options include the Meridian, Oriental and Peninsular, which offer a five-course dinner created by world-famous chef Marco Pierre White. There is also the Horizon Buffet where you can graze all day.
After Barbados we had a day at sea en route to Curaçao. There is plenty to keep guests occupied and I had a go at archery before we headed to the Crystal Room for a quiz and The Live Lounge for a quick game of bingo. These are two of Britannia’s entertainment venues, the former offering everything from quizzes to ballroom dancing lessons. The latter features singers and comedians, and is also Britannia’s late-night disco venue.
The main place is the Headliners Theatre, where we saw talented Irish folk-style band The Privateers. If you want something a little more relaxing there are usually pianists playing in the Atrium and the smart Crow’s Nest bar.
The next day we arrived at Curaçao, the largest of the Dutch Antilles and just 40 miles from Venezuela. Its capital Willemstad is very pretty… think Amsterdam but with all the buildings painted in bright Caribbean colours. While there you may want to pick up a bottle of the famous blue liqueur which bears the island’s name.
Seated in an open, vintage army truck, with very bouncy suspension, Alison and I headed off on an off-road adventure to a local nature reserve. We were thrown about and spattered with mud as we saw iguanas, flamingos and caves full of bats. Our messy but exhilarating day finished with a very large margarita each at the 5 O’clock Somewhere seafront bar.
Our next destination was Bonaire. Also Dutch, it is the least developed of the ABC islands, the others being Curaçao and Aruba.
With its crystal-clear waters, Bonaire is a popular diving destination but we took a trip to see its famous salt flats (where salt has been extracted since the Spanish discovered the island in 1499), flamingos and wild donkeys. We then took our first dip in the Caribbean’s warm waters at Sebastian’s Beach before rounding off the day with a beer at yet another wonderful seafront bar, the Pier Dos.
A further day at sea followed before we visited Saint Vincent, Grenada and Saint Lucia, all of which rise out of the ocean like lush, jungle-covered mountains. From Saint Vincent – one of 32 islands that make up the area – we boarded the Fantasea catamaran for a beach day at neighbouring Bequia.
A local restaurant brought food to the boat and, after another dip in the Caribbean, we ate in the sunshine on the deck. Grenada, one of the Caribbean’s prettiest islands, is known as the “Spice Isle” because of the nutmeg and mace that grows there.
Our guide Tristan told us that Grenada’s 1,000 acres of rainforest get up to 78in of rain a year, and this is the only place where we got caught in a brief shower. Driving along the island’s steep narrow roads, Tristan then took us to the Annandale Falls. This 30ft-high waterfall, surrounded by lush vegetation, has a pool at the bottom deep enough to swim in.
Stopping along the way to collect samples of spices for us to smell and handle,Tristan then took us to Grand Etang Lake, situated in rainforest 1,700ft above sea level. There we saw several of the mona monkeys that live on the island. One tourist got more than he bargained for when a monkey climbed on his head and made an unsuccessful grab for his lunch.
Saint Lucia is the picture-perfect idea of a Caribbean island, with two majestic Pitons rising out of the ocean. These volcanic peaks, Gros Piton and Petit Piton, are a UNESCO world heritage site.
We hired a taxi for a quick tour and the driver proudly told us about Saint Lucia’s two Nobel Prize winners – economist Sir William Lewis and poet Derek Walcott. We then stopped for a photo opportunity high above beautiful Marigot Bay, where Dr Dolittle, starring Rex Harrison, was filmed in 1967.
The Caribbean has it all, culture, amazing scenery, wonderful weather and friendly people. And unlike Chesney Hawkes, it gives you hit after hit and certainly deserves a place in anyone’s travel top 10.
Book the holiday
P&O Cruises offers a 14-night fly-cruise round trip on Britannia from £1,649pp. Departs from Barbados on November 15, calling at Curacao, Aruba, St Vincent, Grenada, St Lucia (overnight), St Maarten and Antigua, ending with an overnight stay in Barbados. Includes flights from selected UK airports. pocruises.com
More into at curacao.com aruba.com discoversvg.com puregrenada.com stlucia.org vacationstmaarten.com visitantiguabarbuda.com visitbarbados.org