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After after enduring Multiple Sclerosis for more than 30 years, Ian Douglas reached the decision to take his own life due to being at ‘a bare minimum of physical function’
The brave son of a man who took his own life after enduring Multiple Sclerosis for more than 30 years is urging MPs to vote in favour of the assisted dying bill tomorrow.
Anil Douglas, 35, agreed to share with the Mirror the heartbreaking note he found by his dad Ian’s body in their home February 2019. Ian described in his letter how he reached the decision to take his own life due to being at “a bare minimum of physical function”.
It reads: “To whom it may concern. If you are reading this, I expect I have passed on. I intend to take my own life. This is my third attempt.
“I would like to have to put on record that had we more sympathetic assisted-dying laws in this country, in all probability I would still be alive today. Nobody else knew about this or helped me in any way, and I have felt under no pressure to take this step.
“It is my decision and mine alone. I have lived with MS for over 30 years and am now reduced to a bare minimum of physical function although my mind remains clear and lucid. I have left more personal notes for loved ones, explaining my decision in detail.
“In the event that I am discovered before I have passed away, I do not want to be resuscitated.”
Ian nursed wife Reena to her death, from breast cancer, in 2008 aged 59, and watched as she “withered away to something we did not recognise,” Anil said. Also aged 59 and one day before his 60th birthday, Ian decided to take matters into his own hands as his condition deteriorated.
“He had obviously picked a line in the sand that he did not want to cross,” said Anil, who works in video and film editing. At the time of his death he was incredibly disabled, he was confined to a wheelchair, in a huge range of physical pain and discomfort, he was experiencing severe spasms and the obvious nerve disintegration of having a neurological condition.
“He was getting urinary tract infections, constipation, incontinence He had almost a complete lack of mobility and dexterity.
“Watching him become less able to do the things he was less able to do a week, month or year before was incredibly difficult for us, let alone for him. He knew pretty soon he would have none left and that if he did not take action then he would be helpless. There’s such a thing as a good death and a bad death and my dad had a really bad death.
“And as a result of him having a closed, isolated, cloak and dagger death, it resulted in bad grief, or a very difficult grief.”
Anil added of tomorrow’s crucial vote: “The bill is a vital chance to finally allow dying people choice, and the chance to choose a safe and compassionate death instead of the lonely and dangerous death my father was forced to choose.
“MPs have a once in a generation opportunity to vote for meaningful change, so that we can all live life with the knowledge that none of us will be forced to suffer when we die. I urge every single MP to vote for the bill, and to vote for a safer and more compassionate future for dying people.”
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Whatever you are going through, you don’t have to face it alone. Call Samaritans for free on 116 123, email jo@samaritans.org or visit www.samaritans.org for more information
When life is difficult, Samaritans are here – day or night, 365 days a year. You can call them for free on 116 123, email them at jo@samaritans.org, or visit www.samaritans.org for more information
