A woman was left confused when she found out about her parents’ sneaky plan to protect her, but they said that they’d always put her wellbeing first over everything else
Many couples nowadays will sign prenups before they get married to ensure that wealth from both sides is protected – but one dad felt his daughter’s document didn’t protect her enough, so he hatched a plan.
His wife explained that when they told her of her dad’s plan to make a ‘just in case fund’ for her, she felt like they were “rooting against her”, and she was a little bit miffed about it – but they assured her that everything they did was in her best interest. When their daughter’s husband caught wind of what they’d done, he was also “p***ed”, accusing them of not “trusting him”, but they just wanted what was best for their daughter.
The concerned mum took to Reddit’s ‘Am I The A**hole’ forum to ask whether she and her husband had done anything wrong. She penned: “My daughter has been married to her husband for three years and they recently had their first child.
“The entire time they’ve been married, she’s been a housewife and now she’s a stay-at-home mum with no plans to return to work. I think that’s fine and have been supportive. I also know she and her husband both have sizeable life insurance policies so if god forbid, one dies, they’ll be okay.
“However, she also signed a prenup. Which again, I think is smart. But according to my daughter, she’d get a very small settlement. And even with child support, there’s a good chance she’d have to return to work. And after being out of the workforce for a bit, who knows if that’ll be a challenge. My main worry is my niece fell into this scenario and even with child support, she struggled.”
After providing background for their predicament, she explained that she and her husband, her daughter’s father, had set up a “just in case account” so “if she and her husband divorce, she’ll have money to fall back on just in case.” She went on to explain: “If they remain married past the time my husband and I die, it’ll just be added to what she’ll inherit.”
She said that she “didn’t intend on telling her about it”, unless the worst happened, but her “husband pointed out that if she was ever in a situation where she wanted to leave but worried she financially couldn’t, it’d be good for her to know she has a Plan B.”
Telling her didn’t go as smoothly as the pair had hoped, however, as she was “a little surprised”, saying that she thought her parents were “rooting against her”. Her mum wrote: “I said we love her husband and hope they have a long, healthy marriage. We have always been supportive. But this is similar to the prenup. A just in case. A last resort.
“Well, she told her husband and he’s p****d at us as well, saying that we don’t trust him. I said it’s looking out for our daughter and really is no different from the prenup. I added that just as he’ll always want to protect his daughter, we’ll always want to protect ours.”
In the comments, people backed her parents, saying they understood why they wanted the extra layer of protection for their daughter. One penned: “Not the a**hole. In his own words, your son-in-law said he doesn’t trust your daughter by having her sign a prenup. Does nobody see the double standard?”
Another wrote: “I was raised to always know my parents were there and would help me. I know I had a somewhat privileged upbringing, but when I found myself in a bad relationship and was ready to get out I called my parents. They bailed me out immediately. I think it’s fantastic that the original poster thought of the scenario where their daughter might need help but I’m surprised the daughter wasn’t already very aware, even without words, that he parents would always help her and her children.”
Someone else shared: “Original poster is not the a**hole, but I’m looking at their daughter sideways. The daughter signed a prenup that leaves her with a small settlement knowing that she’s planning to be a housewife/stay-at-home mum? Then original poster (parents) informs the daughter that they’ve set aside a small fund for her to access if/when her marriage takes a turn.
“Instead of daughter profusely thanking her parents for looking out for her well-being and that of her child(ren) she runs and tells her husband…I’m really wondering where the daughter’s common sense is. Why did she need to tell her husband about this fund that her parents were putting together for her?! This is not something you must communicate to your spouse. If their marriage is a happy one, then there’s no need to think about this fund beyond the initial communication with her parents.”
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