A woman was left seething when she realised that her husband had paid for her engagement ring using some of her funds, without consulting with her prior to purchase – and she wanted it sent back
Many people have a rough idea about what their ideal engagement ring would look like – but would you be prepared to make a financial contribution towards it without consenting?
One woman was left seething when she found out that her husband had allegedly purchased her engagement ring with funds from their joint account – but to make matters worse, she only realised once they were wed. “An engagement ring is considered a gift in most modern societies even today and I don’t care if you disagree with that it’s just what the cultural expectations are”, she fumed, saying that she had demanded that he send the ring back because she wasn’t happy with how he’d gone about purchasing it.
Taking to Reddit, she asked if she was being unreasonable for “demanding” her husband returns her engagement ring because he was “making” her pay for it through their joint account.
She penned: “My husband (30M) and I (28F) have been married for just under 3 months and have been having a huge argument about my engagement ring. We got married one month into him proposing to me.
“It wasn’t a fancy wedding and we had our honeymoon right after we signed the papers at the courthouse. He gave me a diamond engagement ring that’s close to 8K – a 2 carat lab diamond. He didn’t have funds available readily as we are saving for a home so he put this ring on a payment plan.
“I found out after we married and merged our finances that he has been withdrawing funds from our joint account (we make roughly the same) to finance this ring. I was just taken aback and honestly put off by the fact he is making me pay for a GIFT he gave to me.
“We have been having some arguments lately and he feels that ring is a wedding expense and it’s only fair that I contribute towards it too, and that as a woman of this day I shouldn’t hesitate to be an equal partner. I call bulls**t and shared my thoughts on this whole thing.”
The woman said she believed an engagement ring was a “gift”, and you shouldn’t make people pay for them. Also, she fumed that she’d “unintentionally partially paid for two instalments now”, making her “part-owner of the ring”. She said that if she’d have known her husband was going to make her pay for the ring, she wouldn’t have agreed to it, saying that “mutual consent” should be essential when “investing in an asset”.
“Owning a house or a car jointly requires two ‘yeses’ and I wouldn’t certainly have said yes to jointly owning a ring he was SUPPOSED to give to me as a gift. So I can retroactively decide now I never wanted to own it and have been demanding that my husband returns the ring to the store if paying for the ring hurts his pocket so much”, she raged.
She said that he should never have taken a payment plan out and used their joint funds to finance the ring, and she said she tried to speak about how she felt with him, and he called her “sexist”. “I put my foot down not because I can’t afford it or I refuse to financially contribute or give my husband a nice gift, but my husband’s sheer stubbornness and tackiness about wanting me to pay is what p***es me off.
“I don’t mind splurging for him, but this whole situation has left a very bad taste in my mouth”, she raged, finishing her post by saying that her husband expects an apology because she called his actions “tacky”, “scammy”, and “in bad faith”.
In the comments, someone asked: “Why are you rushing to set up joint accounts with someone you don’t trust?”, and another agreed, penning: “There are some red flags here for sure”.
Another suggested the husband may even be lying about the price of the ring, as they wrote: “Low key think the dude is lying and siphoning away money. A lab grown diamond that’s 2ct does not cost that much at all…people don’t realise lab grown is much, much cheaper than a real diamond.” They continued: “Just googled to double check, and the most expensive 2ct lab grown diamond I found was 3.6k…not 8k.”
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