Coleen Nolan advises a reader and her husband who can’t look a couple in the eye since a dinner date took a strange turn
Dear Coleen
I moved to a new area with my husband and children a few months ago and we’ve struggled a bit to meet new friends. However, we did click with a couple we met at a school social and they invited us over to their place a couple of weeks later, as their kids were staying with grandparents.
They’re a very attractive and interesting couple and we had a great dinner that night – lots of fun and laughter, until the evening took a bit of a turn.
The husband said: “Shall we have some proper fun?” and then he put a porn movie on the telly. At first l laughed, but then I realised he wanted us to get involved, as he started kissing his wife and she dropped her dress to the floor, so was standing there in her lingerie.
The husband invited us to join them, at which point my husband and I looked at each other in terror. My husband mumbled something like: “We’ll leave you to it”, and we got out of there as fast as we could.
We haven’t stopped talking about it since and I can’t look this woman in the eye when I see her at the school gates.
The thing is, this couple are very popular among the other parents, so the whole thing is so awkward. We’ve been doing our best to avoid them but, the thing is, our kids are friends. What would you do?
Coleen says
Well, that is a bit of a shocking turn of events, but you didn’t get involved, so you have nothing to feel embarrassed or worried about.
Maybe some of the other parents have joined in, but you made it clear by politely “leaving them to it” that swinging and swapping is not for you.
You were attracted to this couple, and they were obviously attracted to you, so it sounds like they were testing the water to see if you were into the same thing. Maybe you feel that you can’t be friends with them now, but I would not let it affect your children’s friendships in school.
If this couple are acting normal and not trying to avoid you, then I would just carry on as usual, make small talk at the school gates and don’t spread any gossip about what happened on the night either.
If there are social things going on, which involve this couple, maybe stick to going “out out” instead of to someone’s house for dinner.
