WARNING: DISTURBING. Kiena Dawes left a heartbreaking last wish within her suicide note that was found on her phone, which she’d left with her infant daughter at a friend’s before taking her own life
The heartbreaking last wish of a mum who took her own life after suffering years of abuse at the hands of her partner has been revealed in her tragic suicide note.
23-year-old Kiena Dawes left the tragic suicide note, penned on her phone, next to her eight-month-old daughter whom she left with a friend before going to a railway line and committing suicide. Kiena took her life in July 2022 after suffering two years of horrendous abuse at the hands of her partner, Ryan Wellings, 30.
In her haunting note Kiena states she was “murdered” saying Wellings “killed me”, with a court hearing how the hairdresser suffered multiple injuries as she was struck by a Glasgow-bound train travelling at 110mph. Wellings’ abuse was described as a “significant factor” in Kiena’s decision to end her life, with Kiena being attacked just 11 days before her death.
In her suicide note, Kiena revealed a truly heartwrenching last wish. She said: “I hope my life saves another by police services acting faster”. She also added that she wanted her daughter “kept away from the monster who is called her dad.”
After a six-week trial at Preston Crown Court, Wellings, a landscape gardener from Bispham, Lancashire, was found not guilty of manslaughter but guilty of assault and guilty of controlling and coercive behaviour toward Kiena. The jury heard how practically from the beginning of their relationship, Kiena was repeatedly subjected to controlling behaviour, abuse and violence, which continued throughout the course of their relationship to “grind” her down.
Kiena had been diagnosed with an emotionally unstable personality disorder that resulted in increased impulsivity, poor self-esteem and difficulty in relationships. The court heard how Wellings allegedly preyed on this and exploited her mental health condition, and while her condition played a part in her decision to end her life, so too did Wellings’ behaviour.
The pair first met in January 2020, when Kiena was “swept off her feet” by Wellings. Within a week, Wellings had Kiena’s name and face tattooed on himself and within just three months he proposed. However, Kiena confided in a friend that her relationship was a “fairytale that had turned into a nightmare.”
In chilling notes hidden on her phone disguised as food shopping lists, Kiena documented Wellings’ abuse – from insults about her weight and her abilities as a hairdresser to threats of violence, such as threats he’d use a drill on her teeth or throw acid at her to disfigure her. On the day of her death, Kiena left a heartwrenching note in her phone beside her baby daughter.
“The end. I fought hard, I fought long,” she wrote. “I went through pain no one could imagine. No one will know what I went threw [sic]. I was murdered. Slowly. They tortured me till there was nothing left. I lost my fight but I didn’t give up my battle. I fought till the end. Ryan Wellings killed me.”
For mental health support, contact the Samaritans on 116 123, email them at jo@samaritans.org or visit samaritans.org to find your nearest branch.
For confidential support, call the 24-hour National Domestic Abuse Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 or visit womensaid.co.uk. If you or your family have lost a friend or family member through fatal domestic abuse, AAFDA (Advocacy After Fatal Domestic Abuse) can offer specialist and expert support and advocacy. For more info visit** www.aafda.org.uk**.
