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Chances of survival looked bleak when Graham Faulkner, then aged just 20, suffered kidney failure following an infection and had to have dialysis three times every week
Everything you need to know: organ donation
A grateful dad who was kept alive by an organ donation 40 years ago has made a desperate plea to find the family of the “lad who saved my life”.
Since Graham Faulkner received a kidney on August 28, 1984, he has been able to go on and marry, have two children, one grandchild and forge a successful career as an NHS nurse and nurse at a prison. Speaking to mark Organ Donation Week which begins today Graham, now 62, said he would be “so happy” if he was to find relatives of the tragic 19-year-old man whose kidney he received.
Graham knows it is likely the family are from Birmingham as the young man died in a motorcycle crash, which happened in the Selly Oak area of the city in late August 1984. There was no organ donor register at the time and so instead families were asked the question during “the worst situation of their lives”.
Fighting back the tears, dad-of-two Graham told the Mirror: “I would really like to thank the person’s family. I know he died in a motorbike accident and there wasn’t a register at the time, so it was just the goodwill of parents in the worst situation of their lives and these did agree. I’ll never fail to get upset wen I think about that. They may still be alive now because he was younger than me. The lad saved my life.
“It would make me so happy to meet them. I wrote a letter to say thank you, which you were encouraged to do at the time, but I’d like to thank them personally. Hopefully someone will make see this and make the connection and see this, because it’s something you do, don’t you?”
Doctors at Queen Elizabeth Hospital Birmingham told Graham the donation would extend his life by five to ten years, but this summer he celebrated the 40-year anniversary of the procedure. He has become one of the longest-living transplant patients in the country as a result. He waited for two years for the kidney, during which time he needed regular dialysis following a childhood infection which affected the structure of his own organ.
Recalling vividly the phone call to say a match had been found, Graham said: “I remember it well. You were hoping for the call but dreading it as well, because sometimes you get false alarms and it might not go ahead, but it did. The call was late at night and you had to then transplant the kidney in a short space of time, not like today where nowadays it can be kept in the fridge so to speak.
“So back then, it had to be done as soon as you got it and this call was on August 23, 1984. It was quite a big thing, quite emotional. I had the surgery on August 28 but none of us could be sure of the outcome.”
And Graham had to return to the operating table to have spleen removed due to a complication. He spent two weeks in hospital and was allowed to return home, where he had to isolate for three months with his parents because he was so vulnerable to infection.
But five years later, Graham married his partner Penny, with whom he has two children; Rachel, who is a teacher, and Laurence, who like his dad, is a nurse in a hospital.
In late August 1984, when Graham got the call and had the transplant…
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In Coronation Street, Bill Webster despaired as his daughter Debbie left school with no qualifications and dated biker Daz Isherwood – but Debbie chose Daz over her father when Bill gave her an ultimatum. Mavis Riley also got engaged to Derek Wilton – quickly after her relationship with Victor Pendlebury ended.
“I would like to meet them (the family of the donor). It was August Bank Holiday, and it was a motorbike accident in the Selly Oak area so it must be a local family. I would be so happy, and hope that it does happen, that someone makes the connection because I’d like to express my gratitude to them,” Graham, now a proud grandfather of one, added.
“I still don’t know much about the donor. I wrote that letter to thank them but I have never been sure if they ever knew how their decision changed my life… It still makes me emotional when I think about how their decision to donate their loved one’s organs saved my life. I wonder if they often wonder what happened to their loved one’s kidney. Forty years is a long time, and doctors said at the time the kidney would give me five or ten years, but now I’m one of the oldest surviving donor recipients in the country, certainly the oldest in this city.”
Graham, who works at Birmingham Children’s Hospital, was put on the transplant waiting list at 20 after both of his kidneys failed following the childhood infection. He had to undergo gruelling dialysis, which clears the body of excess water and toxins, three times a week in the meantime.
The dad, who lives in the Rednal area of Birmingham, said: “A lot has changed in 40 years but then I had to spend three days a week in hospital for dialysis. It was my life. The default, if there wasn’t a match, was the dialysis but back then, it wasn’t particularly advanced and I couldn’t have been on it forever because unfortunately, you’d get a complication.”
The NHS says Organ Donation Week highlights the importance for people to confirm their decision about being an organ donor by signing the organ donor register. Wishes of families are always honoured, even though the NHS uses a presumed consent/opt-out system.
