Imagine finding out that your whole marriage has been built on a lie and that your partner’s name isn’t what you think it is – would you be able to forgive them for such a betrayal?
A man has revealed how he recently discovered his wife previously changed her name and gave herself a new identity. Stunned by the confession, he admitted that he couldn’t believe she had done this and kept it a secret from him.
Sharing all on Reddit, he wrote: “We’re in our mid-30s now. We are Hindu immigrants in Canada and have somewhat traditional birthnames – which is what I thought we always used.”
However, during a recent outing to the supermarket, they bumped into her old friend who kept on calling her by another name – Shyneigha Star. He added: “It’s pronounced Shine-yah Star – inspired by ‘Shining star’ apparently.”
“She kept calling my wife this name. I was confused and corrected her. And then she got confused. My wife glossed over it quickly and changed topics. My wife then revealed to me that before we met, she briefly reinvented herself with a new name 12 years ago.
“She revealed to me that she went through a phase / identity crisis right after graduation. She was tired of her birthname being traditional. And she wanted to become more ‘western; in the hopes of appearing more favourable when applying for jobs. So she invented a new name and started using it.
“Couple of years in, realising that she is not a stripper (she is a nurse), switched back to using her birthname. All this happened 5+ years before we met. I never expected my wife to have an awful name. I’m feeling betrayed. I mean, how can I ever trust her again?”
He said he felt as if their entire marriage was “built on lies”, and questioned what else she might be keeping from him. He added: “I don’t see how we can possibly recover from this devastating revelation. Time to lawyer up, hit the gym, and prepare for a custody battle for our two-year-old.”
However, the husband later revealed he was joking about getting a divorce, and had ultimately really enjoyed making fun of her. One person sympathised: “I have a friend who is Indian and for a brief time went by Batman bc they were sick of people not pronouncing their name correctly. Thankfully this phase did not last long.”
Another user admitted: “Reminds me of the cringe phase I had where I went by Bugadochoo, or Bugzy.” And someone else replied: “I just admire the cohones of someone being like ‘I go by Shining Star now’ fully committing to it with the confidence of a thousand shining stars and then having the same confidence to be like ‘eh, it’s not for me. Back to Charlotte it is’.”
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